Not another Mary Sue!
by shoeychocolatXD
Summary: a short parody of ANOTHER mary sue! this is what happens when you play with alan moore's creation. you get burned, or blown up with someones mind! One- Shot


**OH GOD not another mary sue!**

**well this is my poorly written parody fic about mary sues**

**also it is making fun of rorschachs in ability to speak right because of these things and daniels extreme potty mouth that always seems to come out of fanfiction as well**

**ENJOY**

* * *

Katlin merrena was a beautiful woman; she just didn't see it. She had really short hair and an interestingly beautiful face. Her eyes where a green color.

She had just moved into an apartment complex that was run by a woman named Mrs. Sharp. Here is how her story went down.

"hello, my name is Katlin, I want to live in the apartment that you have for rent"

The old woman who had way to many kids and apparently none of them where of the same father because none of them where of the same ethnicity, gave her a once over.

"Hundred dollars every week, apartment is down the hall, hope you don't mind living by an ugly redhead that smells like he rolled in a sewer."

mrs. sharp handed her a key and slammed the door in her face.

"Um ok then, I guess I could uh, walk down this foreboding hallway without getting mugged, thank you Mrs. Sharp"

She started to walk down the hallway when she got to the door that sharp pointed to. Apparently that was the neighbors door.

The door opened and out came the man she was warned about.

_Huh, I don't see an ugly redhead; all I see is a terrifying looking stinky man who could kill me for looking at him wrong and has deep set mental issues. OOHHHH I want to be his girlfriend!_

She stared into his eyes. She couldn't tell if they where brown or blue, they kept changing.

_Dang it fan fiction, quit changing his eye color. Choose Jackie or the original, you cant have both!_

Ok then, how to make him hers.

_OOHHH lets follow him that would be a real treat._

Soon after exiting the apartment building, Katlin got lost.

_Maybe I should go into this alleyway, it looks safe enough!_

But alas, the alleyway wasn't and some big scary knot tops attacked.

"oh my god, I didn't see this coming at all, I hope they guy who is supposed to save me does it before I get wounded seriously enough that I go unconscious for a very long span of time"

She kicked and struggled but alas, it was not to be. She was stabbed three times before Rorschach heard her screams.

* * *

HURM, woman hurt, no hospital, to Daniel, he know what to do, mile away, take whore anyway.

Rorschach didn't know what to do with this woman, he hated women but this one has something. Something he cannot quite place, a feeling that ate away at every single one of his morals and personality traits given to him by the almighty creator Alan Moore.

"Hi ho, hi ho, its of to Daniel's we go."

* * *

At Daniels.

"what the fuck Rorschach, why the hell did you bring this god damn woman here, im tired of your fucking antics, you break into my house, eat my beans, steal all of my fucking sugar, and insult all of my girlfriends, you know they all stopped coming around. That is why I am middle aged and fat. Aw hell, just bring her in and stick her on my guest bedroom"

Daniel looked at rorschach and rorschach looked back.

_damn that mask is fucking creepy. really fucking creepy._

Rorschach put the woman on the guest bed and ran to the convienetly placed open window.

"be back in another week to pick her up."

And like that he was gone.

"God damn it Rorschach." And like that, Daniel was gone as well. All of the woman's wounds where magically healed because that is how fan fiction works now doesn't it.

* * *

The next morning

_Ugg, what happened, all I remember was following Walter, getting attacked, a swirling mask and waking up here. Where is this, well that is ok because I bet it is Daniel dribeurg house, I don't know how I know that, maybe I know him form elsewhere or I ..no you know what, I don't know him. Im just gonna go and talk to him_

Katlin goes downstairs to see Daniel sitting on a couch watching something about owls and wearing owl themed underpants and a brown cardigan.

He turned to her, looked suprised and spoke.

"Oh sorry I forgot I was in another fan fiction. I usually dress nicer when im in one of those. You know what, im not wearing any pants now because it is my house and they can all go to hell"

"um, so you are Daniel driberg?"

Katlin turned to him with a big smile on her face

"you are pudgier now than you where when you where nite owl"

"god damn it Rorschach, how many girls are gonna know my secret when this is all said and done with?"

Daniel turned back to his owl show and began to drink his beer that he had been drinking all morning.

"gonna drink too, oh yeah and if you go out to eat, go to the gunga diner. A redheaded hobo walks around there and somehow all of my other wards find the guy and fall in love with him"

"ok thank you Daniel, I actually am gonna go"

and with that, she grabbed her coat and left.

* * *

Two hours later

She met the hobo at the gunga diner, as expected, made a pun about the end of the world and asked him to take a walk with her.

"so walter, what do you do for a living"

Katlin hung on to his every word. Never had she met a more fascinating and clinically depressed slash schizophrenic man in her life.

"hurm"

"oh really, that seems fascinating"

"enk"

"ok now, I have a question for you"

"just asked one"

"well another one"

"erm"

"kiss me"

"don't want to"

Suddenly all the fan fiction fan girls glomped him.

"YOU KISS HER AND YOU WILL LIKE IT OR ELSE, WE WANT OUR HAPPY ENDING!"

"yeah, I am the embodiment of all of these girls, so you better kiss me"

Katlin smiled sweetly as the girls let walter up.

"don't run now, im sure there is no where to hide and they will find you"

"mother was a whore, did things, cant kiss you BAD!"

"um, ok, thank you for sharing that with me. i think it really defined our relationship. now you have to kiss me."

And then she glomped him. He tried to fight back but it wasn't enough. There where too many of them.

"HELP ME!"

he screamed but to no avail. a half an hour later of screaming and a drunken comedian staggerd to the pile of women.

"did someone call for help?"

The comedian was dressed in full costume to.

"im not supposed to die until you have sex with her so, im just gong to laugh at you and take pictures.

"you bastard!"Rorschach yelled faintly under the pile of women

"im not doing this anymore, if you help me kill all of these women, I will make sure that you live to rape and pillage other countries again"

the comedian looked sceptical. why should he trust rorschach?

"why should I trust you shrimp?"

"because you have to"

"nope im just going to sit here and laugh at you"

"GAA"

An then, without any warning, dr Manhattan showed up and blew up the world.

* * *

"NOOOOOOOO!"

Rorschach sat up, he had been breathing heavy. It had all just been a dream.

* * *

**OR HAD IT? **

**It is all up to the fans to decide.**

**Join my campaign to stop the torrent of worthless mary sues. Do you really want jon to destroy the world?**


End file.
